Resiliency. It is one of the secrets to survival, both professionally and personally. It is what’s gotten you to where you are and will define who you will become.
Looking back at some of the most challenging situations you’ve endured, you may have felt there was no other choice. All you had was your instinct at your disposal. It’s true that resiliency is a natural-born trait, but most don’t know that it’s also a learned skill. Instead of leaving resilience up to the universe, consider strengthening those muscles by choice. How can we lead a more resilient life in the year to come? I’m going to show you how!
A Core of Confidence
Everyone has an inner critic that they compare themselves to, but why do we do this?
Comparison can create competition that ultimately fuels achievement, but it’s a balancing act. Constructive criticism can deter certain behaviors in the short-term, but positive reinforcement is generally better for shaping new and lasting behavior. Most importantly, it’s at the core of creating confidence.
As a leader, recognize that criticism doesn’t increase competency. You are simply sharing what not to do instead of what to do. Imagine a child learning how to ride a bicycle. Which environment shapes a more confident future cyclist: Pointing out each time they fell down or pointing out what they did right to stay up on the bike? Positive reinforcement is a powerful tool!
Confidence increases productivity and causes you to choose more challenging tasks. When you do more challenging tasks, it makes you stand out amongst your peers. Naturally, you’ll create a more cohesive workplace environment as a byproduct of your hard work. Confident people celebrate the accomplishments of others as opposed to insecure individuals who criticize others in order to prove their worth. Speaking first and often is a sign of high self-esteem and makes others perceive you as a leader. In fact, over-confident people are more likely to be promoted than those who have actually accomplished more.
The fact that successful people tend to be delusional isn’t as bad as it sounds. It’s our belief in our own recognition that gives us confidence. Even though we are not as good as we believe we are, this confidence helps us become more than we would have otherwise. Be confident!
A Fondness for Failure
If you think about it, you’ve probably learned more from failures than any other source of wisdom. Consider failures as beginnings rather than endings. Teach yourself and your team to focus on the facts. Embrace failure’s value as a teacher, get curious about the information it provides, and be open to where it leads you next. You may even find you fail less when you don’t fear failure.
Failure is either redirecting or reaffirming. If failure caused you to take a different path, it’s because you saw it heading towards a dead-end. If failure caused you to get back up and keep going, it reaffirms you are committed to a goal, and it’s worth fighting for. Each situation is a win-win!
The Power of Purpose
We have the freedom to choose our actions, profession, financial needs, and the path of our life. Each day is not about what we have to do but what we get to do. Strength can come from the recognition that there is a bigger purpose behind the choices we make.
Spend time focusing on these points:
- Who in my life do I care the most about impacting? How specifically am I going to mentor and impact those individuals?
- What are five things I would put on my bucket list, and with whom would I want to experience them?
- What experiences am I most appreciative of in my life? How can I help others have that same experience?
- What moment in your life makes you the most proud? How can you duplicate more of those moments?
“The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.”– Ralph Waldo Emerson
The Steps for Success
Teach the importance of taking a breath. Then take another breath. After that, focus on the next best thing to do to keep everything going.
If you wake up suffocated by the list of things that need to get accomplished today, start with getting up and brushing your teeth. Momentum is huge! When you feel anxiety over an important deadline, make a list of things that need to be done and do one of them. If your email inbox is exhausting, unsubscribe to a few distribution lists. Stop looking enviously at other people’s photos on social media, and spend that time scrolling through your own cherished memories instead. Don’t focus on the big things, but instead start with the smallest one and decide where to go from there. Take any action and create some positive momentum!
What are some of the toughest things you’ve experienced? How did you get through them? You probably already know quite a bit about resiliency but just haven’t stopped to admire it.
Today, remember that you’ve got this. The person who has gotten you through the toughest parts of your life is you.
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Top Talent LLC
President and CEO